n. 1. Physics The tendency of a body to resist acceleration; the tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest or of a body in straight line motion to stay in motion in a straight line unless acted on by an outside force. 2. Resistance or disinclination to motion, action, or change.

I am resisting acceleration.  I am stuck.  And I've just searched the internet for some sort of little-known Law of Physics that would give me a remedy, a template of how to defy inertia.  And, disappointingly, but not surprisingly, there ISN'T one! 

Ugh, here I am (again), with a list of To Do's as long as my arm.  One item contained therein, naturally, is to write a blog entry.  So even the thing that I purposely chose to keep me accountable is, well, NOT. 

And how I hate to put it out here, again, like so many things I've not pursued, continued, finished in my 4+ decades of living.  I just hate admitting it.  I feel like a 5 year old who didn't bring her signed parental permission slip back to school, and am the only one NOT getting on the bus for the field trip.  And look how much fun everyone else is having!

And yet, I surely CAN'T be the only one.  Out of 6.3+ billion sentient beings on this planet, there MUST be others that share this cycle with me.  Could it simply be part of human nature?  Part of the way I am as one of those humans? 

Is Being Human one of those afflictions for which drug resistant strains are ever forming?  Can I not avoid it?  What if it IS just a given? And what if knowledge and acceptance that THIS is the way I am, is the key? 

And what if taking one teensy-weensy action step could far outdo the meanest things that I say to myself (and then the rebellious 5-yr. old reaction that says, "YOU can't tell me what to do!")

Looking at the definition again, "the tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest...unless acted on by an outside force.", I see that this is an outside job. 

It's not about mental tweaking, psychological seismic shifting, nor soul-searching archeological digging, but action, no matter HOW smalal.  Just one little snitch of movement.  One infinitesimal completion.

So what would/could happen if I took on being the "Outside Force" in acting upon the straight line of my Creative Inertia? 

As long as I don't feel like I have to move the entire mountain, I can certainly take one small step up it...for today!

"A small daily task, if it be really daily, will beat the labors of a spasmodic Hercules" 
     ~ Anthony Trollope
 
 
...is tomorrow's ego trip."

I heard that in a seminar several years ago, and when I remember to abide by it, it keeps me going, and working toward the next goal, the next accomplishment, the next New Thing that opens me up to new experiences.

It's so easy for me to finish something, feel relieved and self-satisfied, clean up and put things away, and smugly wait for the lauds and praises to come. 

But, sadly, I can only ride on the coattails of one victory for so long, and then the Statute of Limitations expires on how much mileage I can get from it.

I mean, eventually, I'll HAVE to stop talking about my trip to Istanbul, won't I?  And, despite numerous sales, lately, of Belle Pietre, my supplies need to be replenished to create more beauties, and the pieces that aren't moving, reworked into new designs. 

It's the same with singing - when one performance is over, there simply HAS be another audition to prepare for, so that there will be more work in the future.  

And, when one relationship ends, unless I want to sound like so many ladies who say that it's just not worth it, and that they're VERY happy with their big dogs, thank you, I can't expect Prince Charming to knock on my 4th-floor door without me putting at least some effort into the matter.

So, to work I go. 

I'm thumbing through magazines I picked up at Charles de Gaulle airport, showing where Delta & Air France go, to start dreaming of the next travel adventure.  I went to NY for a lesson yesterday and bought THE most gorgeous strings of beads, and then registered for the Philadelphia Designers Market to be held on September 18th, just to keep me motivated.  I'm learning and studying new repertoire appropriate to what my teacher has up his sleeve next for me.  And, I'm looking forward to meeting a handsome, funny man on Thursday for the first time. 

"...it is the courage to continue that counts."
~ Winston Churchill
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It's true for many things, isn't it, that once you experience something better than what you're used to, it's terribly hard to go back.  And maybe that's what keeps us stiving and not settling, so that we can move ahead and up.

It works not only with entrusting my Belle Pietre babies to retail consignment shops, but in handbags, travel plans, and most everything in life.

I'm happy to report that the seemingly endless hours of work required to save a whole collection of my jewelry from their tarnished, mis-treated doom at one location, has already nicely payed off! 

I had news last week from Reg Grant at Grant Jewelers in Skaneateles that he's had great interest in my work, and a number of sales to show for it already!  Not only did he call me personally, but he put a check in the mail that day, and has already requested more pieces!

The owners of Adornamenti are just as particular about the shop.  I visited there not long ago, and Michael - a man after my own heart - had lint roller in hand, tidying up the black velvet display stands!  Now THAT'S how I want my baubles to be treated.  They deserve nothing less.  And neither do I!

Of course it takes seeing something better, and taking the plunge to invest in it, to know that what you're used to is just not working anymore. 

Take the brown leather tote I purchased last month.  It was more than I usually spend (which has always amounted to the best of the cheapest on the sale rack) but I loved it, and felt grand with it thrown over my shoulder.  The fun striped lining now gleams and glams up at me every time I open it to put something in. 

Could I go back to "Pleather"?  Only if I really LOVED it!

Tomorrow I leave for Istanbul.  The opportunity was given to me by my darling student, Ayca Yesim, who presented the offer twice.  In the fall, a trip to Turkey seemed far, far out of the realm of possibility.  When she invited me again in March, her question of, "Why don't you come?", turned rhetorical. 

Why don't I come, indeed!  It's taken some planning, a small dose of courage, and a larger portion of throwing caution to the wind, but I'm leaving tomorrow! 

If I keep settling for what I've always had, that's  exactly what I'll keep getting.  And there is SO much more, different, and better in this world to experience, to explore, to enjoy! 

As Mame declares to Agnes in THE best line from Mame:

Agnes Gooch: "Live?"
Auntie Mame: "Yes! Live! Life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!"

It's up to me to grab the biggest plate, tie a long linen napkin around my neck, and belly up to the banquet table!

Yes!
Live!
 
 
As I was chastising myself for not putting fingers to keyboard here for more days than I have fingers to count on, it dawned on me that I'm surely NOT the only one. 

How many blogs must there be in the Blogosphere that were started with a bang, and not a little self-satisfaction, and have now fizzled out to an inglorious standstill like so many car parts in a junkyard.

These blogs were all created with good reason, having a burning desire to say something important, or a vehicle for expression where one wouldn't have their words squelched.  For me, it was to keep me accountable in this creative process, for I know that when I put a commitment "out there," I'm more likely to keep it.

Human nature, for all it's wonders, let's self-doubt speak louder than the creative impulse, it let's the force of inertia either keep us in motion, or slow us to an inevitable, grinding, stop.

I love music, and reading, and art.  I can only imagine how many potential Mozart's, Shakespeare's and Renoir's there could have been, had they not been stopped, not by lack of talent or acceptance by critics or the public, but by Human Nature. 

And how many other things of life have begun - and ended - that way, a diet, a project, a plan for the future? 

For today, it feels good to put fingers back to keyboard here, knowing that by doing this, I will more likely finish the pieces of jewelry that have remained incomplete this week due to the Stuff of Life.  And by doing so, they will NOT number among so many Things Gone Unfinished.
 
With that in mind, the words of Robert Frost pop into my head, thanks to Mom, who reminded me of the poem during one of our recent tangential conversations.  By my not succumbing to creative inertia, I am taking "the road less traveled by," 

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood  
And looked down one as far as I could  
To where it bent in the undergrowth; 

Then took the other, as just as fair,  
And having perhaps the better claim  
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;  
Though as for that, the passing there  
Had worn them really about the same,
 
And both that morning equally lay  
In leaves no step had trodden black.  
Oh, I marked the first for another day!  
Yet knowing how way leads on to way  
I doubted if I should ever come back.   

I shall be telling this with a sigh  
Somewhere ages and ages hence:  
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,  
I took the one less traveled by,  
And that has made all the difference.  

With thanks and so, so much Love to my Mother, who instilled in me her great love of Nature's Beauty & Bounty, an appreciation for Knowledge & Learning, and who modeled Courage & Stick-to-It-iveness to me my whole life, by how she lives hers. 

Happy Mother's Day, Moomie!
 
 
This week, I listened to Alan (brilliantly) play the Bach Prelude & Fugue (St. Anne) in E-flat Major (BWV 552).  From the sanctuary of First Baptist Church in Philadelphia, I was transported back 6 years, and hundreds of miles away to the Votivkirche in Vienna, Austria. 

I was traveling in Germany, and had made a side trip to Vienna to sing for an agent.  As luck would have it, I was there at the exact time as a dear friend who was to sing in a concert of Russian music in the Votivkirche. 

My sightseeing, the day of the concert, purposely included a trial run from my hotel on Mariahilferstrasse to the church and back, just to make sure that I'd know where I was going in the dark of evening. 

It was a bitterly cold December day, and I pulled my new shearling hat down over my ears as I made my way across the city.  I entered the church, to hear familiar strains of a piece of organ music - Bach's "St. Anne" - that I'd heard so many times at home.

In an instant, the familiarity of the work made me feel not so far away.  I wandered up the aisle, eyes cast upward to the majestic Baroque-ness, welling up in thankfulness that I was able to experience such wonders.

That evening, I attended the concert of the Bolshoi Don Kosaken.  My Bulgarian friend, Georgi, who I had not seen in over a dozen years, was now living in Germany, and was singing as a substitute tenor in the group for this one concert.

Assuming that a last-minute ticket would find me somewhere far in the back, behind a sight-obstructing column, I was giddy with the treatment I received - worthy of a princess! 

Thanks to Georgi, I was ushered to the very first rows, and seated next to the wife of the CONDUCTOR of the group!  In the chill of the enormous church on a cold winter's night, she generously offered me part of her fur coat to tuck around my legs.

The concert of urgent, melancholic, heartfelt, Russian music brought tears to my eyes, with the familiar tunes.  The melodies of that music somehow bypassed the fact that I've never heard some of them before, yet still seem familiar. 

And to see Georgi's smiling, familiar face among the fine singers, made that evening, swaddled in the Conductor's wife's fur, listening to the Music of my People, sung by a dear friend from another time, was pure, Viennese Magic. 

As I left the Votivkirche, the night was crisp and cold, and I looked up to see the brightest of moons.  I made my way to the U-Bahn singing the Moon Song that Mommie and I always sing, in harmony: "I see the moon, the moon sees me.  God bless the moon, and God bless me."

How one piece of music has the power to ignite layer upon layer of memory, is just one of it's wonders.

Thank you, Alan & J.S. Bach, for that one...
 
 
The idea of renouncing all worldly goods and seeking detachment from material things doesn't appeal to me.  Walking through the world with nothing but a saffron robe and an empty rice bowl is for MUCH more highly evolved beings than me.

I like stuff.

I like the feel of things - objects that have weight and texture, substance and permanence.  I like the leftover to hold on to, after the experience. 
My drawers are filled with bits of this and that, amassed from here and there - souvenirs, gifts, reminders, and markers of places visited and things done.  To me, half the fun of the trip is the stuff I come home with. 

Perhaps, I seek to balance the ephemeral nature of singing.  For once a note or a phrase is sung, it's essence of mere vibration spirals out and away into the ether, fading to eventual nothingness.  Gone.  Nothing remains, save the memory in the hearer's ear.   

But then again, maybe I just like stuff. 

It's no wonder that I'm drawn to stones.  What could be more permanent than stone?  The "stuff" of my earliest days of childhood was all like that, things that helped me learn about nature, about cultures, the things of my world, and things that were out of this world!

Who knew that those things, sharks teeth, Indian beads, arrowheads, along with a special cotton -cushioned box of shiny chunks of pyrite, tiger's eye, and obsidian, collected from family travels, would eventually lead me to creating lovely jewelry out of just such stones!
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It's been a hectic couple of days, keeping up with personalized "Thank You's" to all who have become Fans of the Facebook Page (82 as of this moment).  I've taken a clue from an area photographer Scott Frederick (www.scottfrederickphotography.com) who went the extra mile when I became a fan of his work. 

I felt a little afluster, then, when I got up early this morning to go to my church job, where I was to sing a lengthy 15-minute cantata.  "The Way to Emmaus" is, even on the best of days, a "big sing." 

I'm delighted to say that it went very, very well, thanks to Alan's brilliant playing.  It really couldn't have gone better, even if I HAD obsessed about it all week, took to my bed, swaddled my throat, and used an atomizer to keep my cords well-hydrated.

I'm starting to see that things have a way of working out and going more smoothly when I have a balance in my life, and not having that all-or-nothing obsessive focus on just one thing. 

Given that there are SO many things over which  we exert absolutely no control, it would seem that all the worry and single-focus, can really detract (and distract) from the things we DO actually have a handle on.

After the service, I was happily receiving kind words from my colleagues, when Alan said that he had someone for me to meet. 

It was FLORENCE QUIVAR! ~ renowned mezzo-soprano, and absolutely gorgeous woman.  She just happened to come to First Baptist Church this morning. 

She was very complimentary, and most gracious when I nervously fumbled getting my cell phone to take a photo.  What I know for sure, is that it was for the best that I didn't know that she was in the congregation BEFORE I sang!

You just never know...
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Mezzo-soprano Florence Quivar ~ First Baptist Church, Philadelphia, PA
 
"People,... 04/17/2010
 
...people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world."  (sings Barbara Streisand)

How LUCKY I feel, after the launch of the "Belle Pietre" Facebook Page a day ago, to have dozens of (OK, as of this very moment, 70) Fans already!  What a wonderful way to promote this work, and what a valuable tool social networking can be.

I'll admit now that I created the page months ago, at the same time that I created a Fan Page for Dan May ~ www.danmaycd.com ~ friend, colleague, and BRILLIANT Singer/Songwriter. 

Of course it was easy telling the world about HIM.  My hesitance about promoting myself, naturally, fell under the category of (what's now becoming a pretty boring story about) "Tooting One's Horn."  

What a wonderful thing, that it IS becoming boring!  And it's only gotten to that point by working it out here.  Bit by bit, post by post, success by success. 

You really couldn't have told me, on March 31st, when Belle Blog began, that I would be be doing promotion amongst hundreds of friends, colleagues, fans and acquaintances - and now THEIR friends, colleagues, fans and acqauintances, and the circle will continue to widen!

How could I have EVER imagined how supportive and encouraging they would be of me and Belle Pietre? 

Thank you, People!
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Gimme an "A"... 04/14/2010
 
...gimme an L - A - N!!!

Alan!

Alan let it slip that he loved being mentioned here, particularly in reference to our common condition of just-shy-of-diagnosable OCD.  I mention him now, for another reason, lest he be thought of as a mere sidekick for my repertoire of weird "ism's."  
Today, it's in appreciation for him who encourages and supports me in all that I do. 

Alan has a remarkably unflappable persona (except, that is, when we get a good giggle on, in a totally inappropriate place).   Life and people and conditions rarely phase him (by choice), and if he experiences ANY of the self-doubt or caution that I do, he's got me fooled!

It's a sweet and wonderful thing, when, in the midst of one of my Doubtfests, feeling like the dysfunctional whirling dervish to his eye of the storm, to have him genuinely, sincerely say something like, "Awww, that was beautiful!", in that understated way of his.   

It's vitally important to surround ourselves with THOSE kind of people, and to receive THAT kind of help and support.  I'm blessed to have Alan, and many others in my life who do that for me.

The lovely thing is, is that the circle grows exponentially - the more I seek them out, the more like them I become myself, and in turn, all the more I have to share with others. 

Thank you, Alan, for helping me to do what I do.

"No matter what accomplishments you make, somebody helped you."
~ Althea Gibson

 
 
Pablo Picasso, vanguard of modern art, notorious lady's man, and the guy responsible for driving more than one lovesick woman to suicide, is the source of Belle Blog's quote du jour:

"I am always doing things I can't do; that's how I get to do them."

This morning, I read a Status Update on Facebook from the "Chautauqua Belle," an historical paddle wheeler that gives the folks on Chautauqua Lake a taste of what life was like at the turn of the last century, when the only transportation in the area was the steam ship!

The Captain (actually, a young man named Mat Stage who spearheaded the re-building of the vessel some years ago) was calling for photos from people who had cruised on the steam boat, that would be included in their new, updated website. 

On a whim, I looked through my pictures from last summer, and posted a couple of the best on their Fan Page, thinking, "that'll be the end of that."

Merely minutes later, there was a lovely message from Mat in my Inbox, saying how beautiful my photos were, and that they'd give me and Mom a season's pass to ride the Chautauqua Belle to our hearts' content this summer in exchange for the use of my photos!

Who knew I could take website-worthy photos?  And who knew that I could actually take decisive action, when I couldn't already foresee the outcome? 

And so here's to more of THAT (whatever "that" may be) whether I know how to do it, or not!
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The Chautauqua Belle ~ Summer 2009