Several years ago, I had an epiphany when, outside an audition downstairs at Riverside Church, a fellow soprano turned to me, rolled her eyes, and said, "Ugh, I hate this." For all the auditions I've done, and the countless times I'd actually screamed those words to myself in my head, I had always thought it was only ME! No one had ever let me in on their little secret. (I'm forever grateful to Iris Fairfax for that!)
And that's the thing that's so hard about creative endeavors, and the things in life that require us to show ourselves and our creations and work that is so precious because it is birthed from the deepest places within us. It's hard enough alone to let it all hang out. But then when we've screwed up the courage required to do that, we then risk judgement and anothers' measurement of our creative worth.
And THAT'S why the adage, "It's not my business what other people think of me" rings so absurd in an audition, or when certain pieces of my jewelry are swooped up at the local gallery within days, and others sit mournfully on their little black velvet stands, quietly tarnishing, like the oompy kid who's last to be chosen in gym class.
So then, the question begs to be answered, am I less of a singer if I don't get the job? Is my jewelry design not good if it doesn't sell?
No, no, a million times NO!
And this is what is so important to get, is that THIS is just another thing that can stop me from starting.
But "What if it doesn't sell?" "What if I can't recoup the investment I made in these supplies?" "What if people think I'm silly for doing this?" "What if, what if, what if???"
Right,...
...and what if I DON'T?
So, there it is - I have oodles of supplies in my super-organized slant top desk (see previous post). There are strings of gorgeous ice quartz chunks in aqua blue, champagne, and root beer colors, natural citrine, amethyst , lime green mother-of-pearl teardrops, funky pointy shells, amazonite rondelles and carnelian rounds - a rainbow of Mother Nature's myriad colors and textures and shapes!
I have all the silver findings I need, and yard upon yard of beading wire. And, from a burst of inspiration that, thankfully, lasted long enough for me to order them, there are watch faces, darling prayer charms, and book marks just begging to be made into something gorgeous!!!
What a waste all this will have been if, out of caring what others think (or don't) I allow myself to be stopped before starting! The thing is, I always thought it was just ME that worried about such things. It turns out, though, that it's a common human experience - for all 6.7 billion of us.
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it." ~ Goethe
And that's the thing that's so hard about creative endeavors, and the things in life that require us to show ourselves and our creations and work that is so precious because it is birthed from the deepest places within us. It's hard enough alone to let it all hang out. But then when we've screwed up the courage required to do that, we then risk judgement and anothers' measurement of our creative worth.
And THAT'S why the adage, "It's not my business what other people think of me" rings so absurd in an audition, or when certain pieces of my jewelry are swooped up at the local gallery within days, and others sit mournfully on their little black velvet stands, quietly tarnishing, like the oompy kid who's last to be chosen in gym class.
So then, the question begs to be answered, am I less of a singer if I don't get the job? Is my jewelry design not good if it doesn't sell?
No, no, a million times NO!
And this is what is so important to get, is that THIS is just another thing that can stop me from starting.
But "What if it doesn't sell?" "What if I can't recoup the investment I made in these supplies?" "What if people think I'm silly for doing this?" "What if, what if, what if???"
Right,...
...and what if I DON'T?
So, there it is - I have oodles of supplies in my super-organized slant top desk (see previous post). There are strings of gorgeous ice quartz chunks in aqua blue, champagne, and root beer colors, natural citrine, amethyst , lime green mother-of-pearl teardrops, funky pointy shells, amazonite rondelles and carnelian rounds - a rainbow of Mother Nature's myriad colors and textures and shapes!
I have all the silver findings I need, and yard upon yard of beading wire. And, from a burst of inspiration that, thankfully, lasted long enough for me to order them, there are watch faces, darling prayer charms, and book marks just begging to be made into something gorgeous!!!
What a waste all this will have been if, out of caring what others think (or don't) I allow myself to be stopped before starting! The thing is, I always thought it was just ME that worried about such things. It turns out, though, that it's a common human experience - for all 6.7 billion of us.
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it." ~ Goethe
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